the best therapist i’ve ever seen like in person and through online therapy …Premera Blue Cross Betterhelp…so i wanted to wait that time for him this next con would be an individual experience of mine that my therapist when he did appear would in some cases show up like 10 or 15 minutes late without any caution without messaging me to let me understand that he was gon na be late so that simply frustrated me a bit so there’s a tab for journaling and the journal entries are all blank they really have triggered entries now which you can also shuffle through if you want to use those rather and you might pick to share those journal entries with your therapist or just leave them
going into a little bit of my treatment journey and i thought that i had it all figured out but kid was i wrong um so let’s discuss it let’s enter into it so to begin i began therapy at an actually young age fortunately that was something that my mommy did not like hide from me or shelter me from she recognized that i was going through like some psychological things when i was younger and i had some problem um emotionally controling and problems with anger and simply a bunch of different things going on when i was younger so my mommy chose to put me in treatment i loved my therapist as a person um she was black she had gorgeous locks he drove a truly cool vehicle however i as a kid did not truly understand what treatment was i didn’t actually understand that this was the time where you might like talk your service and i didn’t know if if the the train of communication was going to be um you know going from my therapist to my mommy or what that would look like so i didn’t actually um require to therapy along with i possibly could have when i was younger however that allowed for me to a minimum of have that experience and to understand even i didn’t you understand continue the program at the time however that permitted me to have the experience to understand that treatment was certainly a feasible option if i started to have any problems in the future and so fast forward about 15 years i know that presently psychological health and treatment they are both things that are super um they’re they’re spoken about a fair bit nowadays and i went to a physical at the physician and for the very first time ever they had me do a um behavioral health test and it was actually odd because i ‘d never ever had to do that prior to where they simulated a mental health assessment so after they got done doing their assessment they were like oh you require to be in a program like yesterday therefore they got me began in a program immediately and they um throughout that program or at the you understand after that evaluation and at the preliminary assessment throughout the program i was detected with anxiety and anxiety i’ve constantly known that i have actually dealt with those things throughout my
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life and i constantly understood that they showed up in actually ravaging ways throughout my life however i never officially had a diagnosis that remained in like my medical records or anything like that therefore i that took place therefore that was actually that was an interesting experience but i was actually happy to have actually gone through that process and to formally know that there was certainly something happening with my mental health and full openness side note i tape-recorded this video earlier and it wound up being 39 minutes due to the fact that i was mad and so irritated so i started going on a rant ideally this video will not be that long and i’m going to try to quickly go through my my treatment journey anyhow back to it so i started treatment and the breakdown of the expenses were basically the the treatment consultations were 500 a piece total my health insurance covered about 400 approximately dollars and i was paying i had to pay about 100 expense for every single session so it was expected to be a 12-week program and in order to finish it in 12 weeks i had to have at least 2 to four um sessions monthly and then i also needed to have calls that they did behavioral evaluation contacts us to act on the development of my therapy program so if we are doing our computations right if we’re um doing our mathematicals properly um i shouldn’t have actually been amazed when i got an expense for 500 over 500. i should not have actually marvelled but my heart soul and everything dropped to the floor and came back into my body due to the fact that i was super stunned at the expenditure and it provided me the breakdown and i was like yeah i talked with her that day yeah they called me that day but i didn’t i actually didn’t anticipate for it to be as much as it was therefore i currently wasn’t feeling actually positive about the
treatment program not since anything was wrong with my therapist however due to the fact that i still seemed like my life was in not necessarily disarray but i was going through a lot personally and this was this year therefore a great deal of you know i have actually currently spoken about the reality that i’ve gone through really significant life shift and i believed that treatment would aid with that um would assist you understand negate the the the ultimate you understand the important things that took place however it did not therefore um since i seemed like things were still not going the manner in which i believed that they must i was like nah i i i can’t do therapy any longer specifically because of the ex the expenditure and so i stopped seeing that therapist and so fast forward a couple months later i’m still recognizing that i need help like psychologically i’m going through downs and ups i am um going through those um you understand i talked about this in the narcissistic video however i’m going through those low and high mood swings i’m going through like all of these different things that i knew that i could not manage by myself so i was desperately looking for a therapist i was frantically looking for one and i kept facing wall after wall after wall Premera Blue Cross Betterhelp
really feel like she was taking note of me and i in fact choose video treatment um over you understand texting or e-mail whatever i don’t know if they do therapy through e-mail i do not believe so however i in fact choose video over anything and so i did that in hopes that we would be able to develop off of what we had already been sort of discussing and some of the issues that we have been discussing therefore it did not end up being um it didn’t end up being what i desired it to be she appeared to be actually sidetracked it remained in my mind it resembled she was playing solitaire or something on her computer system like she never for like she would look at me every once in a while however probably 97 of the time she was searching in another instructions and that didn’t truly make me seem like i was injured or being listened to and so she you understand was likewise like on her phone and just i don’t understand it just was truly unusual now much better hope they they just make use of certified therapists and so i had actually looked this uh looked her up because i simply wished to make sure whatever was legitimate and it was um but the um you understand how they say you understand like bedside good manners like with medical professionals i didn’t um i do not actually understand what it would be phone side coach video side manner i don’t understand therapy side way heard manner didn’t work for me um and so like i stated i i didn’t really feel as if i the one thing that i wished to do most like i said was a video choice i didn’t truly feel as if that was the greatest match of my therapist now we did have really you know thorough conversation however um there existed were some times when i would state particular things and
she would react with something that was like very random or sometimes she was you understand react to what i said or like i do not know it simply didn’t appear like she was incredibly present um so i got a brand-new therapist through the better health platform therefore when you are registering for a therapist you need to fill out like this survey and they designate you to somebody and so i filled out the survey again um and it you have to go into you know well i went into depth on my situation therefore that didn’t actually feel good to have to go through that procedure all over again um however i resembled whatever so that brand-new therapist got designated to me and then she sent me a message that said you in fact ought to be searching for somebody who specializes in this i would motivate you to change your company so then i had to refill out the um questionnaire once again go through that whole trauma of filling it out once again and after that i was designated to another therapist so i uh my therapist and i were using the messaging function she wasn’t as responsive as my very first therapist but she still was responsive sufficient and so then i signed up for a video for Premera Blue Cross Betterhelp
so it cost me 272 dollars and that was with the financial aid um and the the one thing that i truly really delighted in about um much better help was the reality that i could speak to my therapist at any point and so that’s what i began doing i was i was talking with my therapist non-stop through text message so we were texting backward and forward talking with her non-stop um any any and whatever that i was feeling i was talking with my therapist about it and um i decided that i wanted to do a video a video with her so i wanted to do a um a live the live video option therefore when i did that um the chemistry and the rapport and all of the things that i felt like we constructed simply wasn’t there and i didn’t.